


Not Where I Was Supposed To Be (But I Love You Anyway)

by SunshineExploder



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Family, Fluff and Feels, Gen, The Dolorosa - Freeform, The Signless - Freeform, i have too many feels for these two, mama d
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-05-26
Updated: 2015-05-26
Packaged: 2018-04-01 06:55:12
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 748
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4010152
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SunshineExploder/pseuds/SunshineExploder
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"No, this is not the life you were supposed to have. But this boy, this signless mutant boy, changed everything. You think that maybe you're okay with that, as long as you can hold him and love him."</p><p>(Or, the Dolorosa is best mama.)</p>
            </blockquote>





	Not Where I Was Supposed To Be (But I Love You Anyway)

**Author's Note:**

> This was originally supposed to go up Mother's Day, but I decided to swap it out and post the other Dolorosa & Signless fic. So this one is going up now. Hope you enjoy.
> 
> Here's to Mama D!

The moon sheds soft light through the forest. The trees dapple its glow with their black shadows, creating patterns that captivate your eyes and try to put you to sleep. But you can't sleep, not now. You heard something around an hour ago, right when you were about to sleep. No more noise has reached your ears, but you still won't rest. Your boy sleeps in your lap, head resting on your bosom. His quiet breaths are the only thing you hear at the moment. You will not sleep. You will not, not until you know that nothing will come for the two of you.

You look down at his sleeping face. His inky hair is mussed with sleep and a bit of almost pinkish drool leaks from his little mouth. His black and yellow eyes are closed to the world. In this moment, he looks like the little boy he truly is. The one you've tried to keep him as. You have tried to keep his innocence. He does not deserve the pain and hardship his blood color will inevitably bring him. So you will do all you can to shield him for as long as you are able. The boy is yours to keep safe, just as the Mother Grub once was.

That midnight hair of his is coarse when you card your fingers through it. The two of you have not bathed in several days. There have been trolls following you. You've allowed time for nothing but minimal sleep and traveling. It's starting to wear on the both of you; you are weary and grimy and exhausted. There's no telling how much longer either of you can keep this up.

This wasn't the life that was meant for you. As a jadeblood, your job was to care for the Mother Grub in the dark caves. You'd been okay with this. Protecting the Mother as well as all the grubs had been rewarding to you. You'd felt like you were making a difference. But then you found him, the little red grub hiding away in the dark. It seemed that even at that stage, he'd known that to be seen was to die. It was pure chance that you had happened across him. 

When you did find him, you knew that you couldn't leave him. If you had left him, someone would have found and killed him on the spot. An innocent life would've been taken in the cruelest of manners for the cruelest of reasons. You would not have been able to live with yourself if you had let such a pitiful creature die.

So you took him. Scooped him up in your arms and ran from the cave into the night. You ran until the first searing rays of dawn peeked over the horizon. Then you moved in the shadows. The sun didn't bother you as much as it would some trolls, and you made sure to never look right at it. Going blind would condemn both you and the grub. The two of you traveled that way for a long time. In fact, you still travel that way. Only now, he's older. He's pupated into his real troll form, albeit as a child. You can tell even now that he will be handsome and strong. 

Your boy sighs and shifts in your arms. His face begins to scrunch up-- it's the horrorterrors coming for him again. They visit him frequently, but you are always there to hush and calm him.

A small cry escapes his lips and he tosses an arm behind him to lay on his back. You use the position to his advantage and rub his stomach. As you rub, you sing quietly. Your voice is so quiet that you can't even make out the words you're saying. Only the notes roll through the night air and fill the space between you two. His face begins to smooth out as quickly as the fear came to it. He settles back against you with another small sigh.

You smile as you look at him. No, this is not the life you were supposed to have. But this boy, this signless mutant boy, changed everything. You think that maybe you're okay with that, as long as you can hold him and love him.

You lean down and press a kiss to his forehead. Your voice is nearly silent as you whisper.

"I will keep you safe from harm."

_"I love you, my son."_


End file.
